時々、女は本当に分かれませんね！Hな事に恥しくしても、一歩で誰か（彼氏じゃねよ！）とそんな事する！それで、理想な恋人達は別れる。

悲しいね、でもこれは事実だぞ！日本語ができるなら、名前を教えずにすぐ分かるはずでしょ。。

残念が、俺は‘別れるいいぞ！’って思っても、何も変われませんね！だけど、彼達の気持ちいは俺はまだ分かれない！多分彼女ができて、ふられたからもう少し分かれる！それまで俺はまだ独身だよ！誰か！助けてくれ！こんな気持ちい体験させてくれ！Hも！

As above.

As I type this, i'm puffing on some cheap Malaysian/Indonesian Marlboro Menthols that I had to STEAL from my dad's cupboard. I think I'll just tell him that I'll buy a local pack for him later, but what actually caused this act of theft? Berd for not riding me in? No. Mrs Lek for not paying me on time? Don't think so. Singapore for setting the damn ass prices of a pack of fags at like the price of a blowjob by a transie? I think that's it! Update: I told my dad about it, and all he said was "WHY YOU KNOW WHERE I PUT MY CIGARETTES?! I THOUGHT YOU EAT THE CHEWING GUM?!" Test market: Pass!

Ok enough about that. Recently, I've been killing myself a lot with the primary 2 kids from Lianhua Primary. If Berd thinks that Guangyang oei was bad, he should try teaching this really impossible class. Imagine this: The best students are the ones asking to go to the toilet every 5 minutes. There is one student called John, who acts like he loves me, and told me he ranked me by giving me all 5s on the evaluation form, but he bullies the girls by digging his nose and placing it on the girls' lips, then there's the autistic fuck who goes around crying every hour and complaining of a headache, but goes to every boy to hit them on the head with a bottle! Not to mention the irritating indian who told me the rest are playing soccer when I shouted at them to line up, but on my asking him what he thinks he should do, said "Then I go and join them"...

The way to the future. In their hands?

Well a lot of things have happened since Carina being fucking irritating --- From a lovely lil` Mina called WaTi and her infamous "Aku Suka MotoR!" to "Guang Yang Oei?"... Sadly I havent had the luxury of undisturbed time to actually sit down for a couple of hours to blog in detail the events that had taken place...

Well in light of the upcoming exams... I figured that JB Link Dua trips will tend to zero as dx tends to zero (where dx = no of days to exams) as such... In anticipation of such a disaster I've taken the initiative to buy £a$c%a&r@t)o(n!o@f>c&i$g&a*r$e£t"t!e^s< juz for chao pia-ing sake! Heh! Yesterday's rush has left us with 1 pack down in juz 1 evening! No fucking joke dude! 5 cool dudes fagging from a pack it was down to nothing in hours! Muahahha!

Okay enuff said... For those who read this Blog regularly... Call me yo for a pack or 2? As a reward! >.<

I confess I'm not exactly the greatest fan of technology... Especially so for mobile phones. I hate having to answer phonecalls, like we HAVE to answer them ALL the time; refusing is NOT an option. When it rings, like slave to the phone, we needa seach for it (that's if you're me), walk to it and answer it. Otherwise it would probably continue screaming at you...

Talking on the phone with some sweet gal could change (I hope!) my extreme view on phonecalls and SMSes... But as it stands I hate phonecalls and SMSes... I wished people wouldnt be able to contact me! (>.<) Hmmmm... Maybe all these stupid sentiments stemmed from soccer bets collection? Perhaps.

So here's the juiciest part of this blog entry... Toyota, as intro-ed by Mel earlier... Has been one such pest of late. She usually SMS to ask if I'm free for the day or wat time my school ends or if tomolo got school (Duh!). And in my reply, whenever I ask wat's the reason behind that question, the answer is always "Juz asking :)"

And so... That led to this and this leads to that... Long story short, here goes:
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"Hi.. Nerdy.. Tomolo got lessons anot? If yes, wat time your lessons end tmr? Pls reply.." ~ Toyota.

"... Why do you even ask such questions? Gimme 5 fucking good reasons why you need to know or how it even affects you... If it's simply juz-wanna-know's sake again, dont ever msg me anymore." ~ BerD with bloodlust powerup.

"Dun msg dun msg lah! Qi bai. Fucking asshole." ~ Toyota, filthy-o-mouthy.

七百？ What ever happened to 伍佰 man?! Creek? Anyway, VICTORY is MINE man YEAH! XD

Oh it was sad~, oh it was sad~...
It was sad when we lost the coin toss, and the heroes~...
Plus the towers and the rax~,
And our gangbang was a mess~...
It was sad when we lost the coin toss~.

Haha, it's like after a lame coin toss, we lost our choices of heroes and totally got owned right from the start. I'd love to say that at the start we were pushing more than the opponents, but after a long break smoking with JW, I came back to see most of our towers gone.
Well I guess that leaves us with no KL Zouk chionging, but we'll just have to settle with a damn dirty JB dinner. The replays will be posted on this blog for all our fans!

Ok so anyone reading this knows that the guys have some big competition. It concerns me as well, cuz' I'm prepared to break my vow of seafood celibecy in the event of them winning the finals. So, the guys, after winning 3 easy games, are in the finals. That means we have secured that $100 second prize money, but we want more crayfish on our filthy table at Damar Market or whatever you call it, so ganbatte guys!

Oh yes, these few days I've rekindled my interest in The Sims 2! After searching around for tools and all, here's my greatest creation as a god yet!

She's just whistling, not blowing my whistle.

If that's the way he's treating a beauty like her, sorry someone's never gonna get laid

If it came with her on it, a bed of nails would sell like hotcakes.

Come tomolo... 2nd March 2005:

The gosu clan of VsV will undertake the arduous task of winning our rights to a free trip to JB / KL with LOTS of food (hopefully lodging too!) through a subsidary game of TFT more affectionately known as... 多他 (More Him)! We will be represented by the following players:

(1) Chieftain Niche - Sandking
(2) Shaman ZixTer - Faceless
(3) Shaman LecieL - Centaur
(4) Grunt AlFie - Lich
(5) Grunt Juan - Banshee
(6) Sheep GosuBerD - Necrolyte

Prize money : 1st $200, 2nd $100, 3rd gets to suck my toes!

Those who will also be there:
(6) Shaman LaVeY - Biased umpire
(7) Sheep IsotopE - Waterboy
(8) Grunt SkuldRoxors - Spy

Those who might be there:
(9) Grunt IcePisces - Up and coming young star learning the ropes
(10) Grunt FatBeaRon - Hot prospect for the future
(11) Grunt Saitoh-Seetoh - Media and Resource Personnel
(12) Grunt Hooey - Chaoooooooooo noob.



Attached is a gosu map hand-drawn by BerD to aid travellers to get to their intended destination... Get off at the 5th (I think...) bus-stop and call (6), (7) or (8) for directions and help. Registration starts 6pm. Kickoff presumedly to start at abt 6:30pm. Be there if you can!

Kopi planned for at 179 kopitiam after compy. Cigarettes provided.

Wish them (as in opponents) luck, lots of it.

In no particular order:
(1) 16 hours of uninterrupted sleep.
(2) Fark a certain customs officer from Venus to hell.
(3) Go on a hot date with Kago Aibon to somewhere we'd be alone! XD
(4) Barcelona to win by at least 1 goal tonight.
(5) Manchester United to also win by at least 1 goal tonight.
(6) Inter Milian to also win by at least 1 goal tonight.
(7) Get a uber massage to totally show my body hell.
(8) 0202 project to disappear oh-so-suddenly.
(9) Totally kickass food like the one we had in JB.
(10) A good smoke.

If you thought sec 1s were cute, wait till you see them blooming into sec 3 students. This is the time when girls transit from cute to cuter/pretty! And can they pose! You can see them taking purikura shots with the most photogenic poses, and they still won't look like cheap whores!

Well some of them though, others don't shave their armpits or have more body hair than me! The boys have matured too, just that some are really so irritating, I should think those are inverse autistic. Especially one who would bounce around even when I'm telling everyone to stand still! He was the target of all bullying in the class, and for reasons I can clearly see.

Seems that by the time I stop teaching for Mrs Lek, I'll have so many drama scripts to write!

When you're bored, anything goes.
http://www.foon.co.uk/farcade/

Cuz' he didn't tell us he went on a hot date with her!

What more could you have asked for... Than a V-day gift like this?!



For this, I thank Melvin-Seetoh aka Mao Shi. The greatest lover, ever.

That's why he's going to be blogging here as well from now on!

Ok, so I've explained the characters, now to the background story.

During this camp that I took, the 3 of these main characters were always together, yakking away, playing themselves silly. So of course, I thought they were good friends! Many crazy stories about them, but I'll leave this to Berd to blog about perhaps if he picks up the blogging pen again. Anyway, 3 days after the camp, they asked me out for lunch.

Jolin and Toyota were both present, but for some reason that I found out later, Creamy wasn't. So we had lunch with this other guy, walked around Northpoint for a while, and we all split. Only then did a message drop from the sky from Jolin, that Creamy didn't come only because she thinks Toyota is uber-noisy and childish.

Ok, so she can be really jabbering non-stop about really nonsense stuff, and laughing while Jolin was telling them to stop and eat their lunch. Toyota can be pretty interesting, but noisy nonetheless. Jolin agrees too, so I ended up kinda bitching about Toyota with Jolin.

All the way to the next week, when Toyota asked me out for lunch again. This time she specified "DO NOT tell Jolin". Well of course I said ok, but I asked Jolin out for lunch on that day and she said she wasn't free. I'm definately not sending myself out as a lamb to the slaughter, going out with the company of really noisy kids, so I told Toyota I wasn't free. At this point in time, Jolin continued, "How about Tuesday?". I was more than happy to meet her, but Toyota then offered to change it to Tuesday! I played along, putting on an act like I'm not gonna tell Jolin about it, just that if she asked me out I'll tell her about it. Well Jolin knows all about this, and she was pretty cool with it so then on Tuesday, I met Jolin on the train platform, and we went to meet Toyota together.

Of course Toyota wasn't very happy about it, but since there were 3 other boys around, they just played in their kiddy group, and there Jolin was faking a smile and appearing really bored instead. They spoke less than 3 times, of which one was Toyota telling Jolin "Seeing your face makes me lose my appetite" in a tone you wouldn't use when you meet Santa Claus. Well the atmosphere was pretty fine, no signs of a catfight yet, but on splitting I immediately texted Jolin asking her if she's fine and offering to meet up another day with Creamy too!

Well I haven't gone on that next lunch trip, but I have a feeling it'll be next week. More to come then!

It should be done with a purpose, only to make it educational. This way, we can all learn something. That's why, for people to learn about 13 yr olds, I'm gonna make a small sacrifice and from now, readers of this blog will be able to learn about people born in 1992.

It all started with me starting a freelance assignment as a soft skill trainer for schools. There's this one school that I'm closer to cuz' of the fact that I was there for 2 days and 1 night, and I got to know some of these kids pretty well. For those who want to know more, here's a character summary. (For certain purposes, I won't be using their real names)

Toyota: This is a girl who's full of spunk and foul language. Her appearance will allow most people to think she's the kind of girl who's well brought up and demure, however in truth she's far from it. She swears like a soldier but has the physique of a 7 year old. Her skirt is worn long, and her top oversized. At the same time, she has rather geeky hair and thick glasses. Rather immature, she laughs over tiny kiddish things and plays around with the boys as if the world is her playground. Her faction consists mainly of boys (as far as I know), and really tiny boys I might add.

Jolin: Cool, collected and the most mature of the lot, this girl might just be my favorite of the whole group. The things she says feels a lot like any of my other friends, and even her hair is layered! She even tells the "kids" playing around to grow up, and stop laughing and start eating. She could be the main enemy of the "Toyota Group" for her "arrogance" and cold treatment along with..

Creamy: She could be an amalgam of the 2 previous characters. She's one who won't hesitate to have kiddy fun, but at the same time, gets irked by some of the more childish things the "Toyota Group" takes part in and talks about. Sporty and aspiring, she displays qualities that even 'Jolin' doesn't. However, she can be really fierce, but doesn't get hated as much as 'Jolin'.

These are going to be the 3 main characters of the story I'm going to start telling. I think it's going to be one big drama, so I'll save some for the next post when I'm not so sick.

To be continued...

Zhuo shou yan, you shou huo, (left hand cigarette, right hand light)
Duo ji nian wo mei qian chou marl-boro. (A few years down, I'll have no money to smoke Marlboros)
This is IT man.. Singapore just raised the tobacco tax prices once again. A pack of good ol' Marlboros costs like 10 fuckin' dollars. Feels like 10 million to me.

These reality TV shows make Survivor seem like a walk in the park. As I'd always say, the Japanese are crazy.

It all started one snowy day in January, 1998 with an audition. The audition consisted of choosing lots because the only talent needed for this challenge was luck. A group of aspiring comedians showed up, and among them was a young man whose stage name is Nasubi, which means eggplant. Nasubi was 'lucky' that day, and was chosen over other aspiring young comedians for a mysterious "show-business related job". He was immediately blindfolded and driven to a tiny one room apartment somewhere in Tokyo.

When he arrived at the apartment, he was shown a stand full of magazines, a huge pile of postcards, and told to strip naked. The room was empty except for a cushion, a table, a small radio, a telephone, some notebooks, and a few pens. There was not a crumb of food, a square of toilet paper, or any form of entertainment. Whatever he needed, he was to win by sending thousands of postcards into contests. The producers left and Nasubi was on his own in his unique survival challenge. Imagine what was going through his mind: How am I going to eat? Why are they doing this to me? How long will it take to get out of here? He must have thought he was in a bad episode of The Prisoner.

Nasubi

From this...	To this.

More when I find links to this other one that I heard of which involves more extreme death inducing proceedures.

Melvin's Lesson of the Day.

Prepare one big mushroom swiss	Take a huge mouthful
Huge I said! Aim for 3 mouthfuls!	Enjoy whole burger in your mouth.

Ain't no pretty sight, but anyone should be able to do it.

Haven't blogged for so long, I decided it was time to do this only to improve my English. Well, lots of gaming action these days, so much that I didn't even bother to touch my PC. The game: Onimusha 2. Okay, I know that it's a relatively old game, but i can say it totally totally owns. Anyone with a PS2 should just play this game over 5-6 times like I did. I mean, Oyu, a character in the game, already looks so good in a set of western armour. But after a 100% completion of all the scenarios, you get to ogle at her wearing a disco diva dress! Now, how much cooler can that get?! I know it's meaningless blogging to everyone about this, but hey, you can't blame a hardcore PS2 addict!

Nicholas was like telling me about this silly video that someone sent him. This team of 3 people just hang around with a video camera, waiting for any random person on the streets to whip out his mobile phone. Well the fun only begins when they run past him/her, grab the yakking unsuspecting fool's mobile *nokia tune ringtone plays*, smash it on the floor and starts stamping on it. Truely entertainment at it's peak. I should check it out myself and post it here when I get it.

Anyway, good stuff coming tomorrow (I hope). Stay tuned!

Plenty of hot dates today man. Kinda like dated with the bed in my bunk, the bed at home, my ps2, my computer, my parents, and oh damn... I thought i could make it in time to consider meeting up with Berd and Junwei in 20 minutes a date. If there was a useless holiday, it's Valentine's Day. It's not cuz' I'm lonely, I don't have a girlfriend, there's no girl desperate enough to get me out or some other pathetic reason why I didn't go out today. I mean, it's not like a day has to be set to send flowers and gifts from your loved ones. This kinda thing can be done any other day right? It's useless also because a) it doesn't excuse everyone from duties in the army, b) there's no off day for this shit.

Well, can't say I'm really happy not doing anything today, but hey, there's always the ps2, prettier, more independent and above all, always there for you.

Now why the hell did I even type that 2nd part of the title? No idea at all, just thought it's quite a cute phrase. Anyway just got home from watching City of God (Cidade de Deus). It's like this really good movie which I'm watching for the 2nd time. It's all about the hood, drugs, games gangs play, and loads of killing and all. The bad part about this movie today is the organising man. Michael was like one hellava person involved in this entire event. He was like messaging me in the afternoon asking if I'm interested in the movie at all, but after asking about 13947423 questions, this little lamer decided not to go at all. And -please- message ah, can don't call ah!

Well anyway, the marvels of the Internet with a capital I. Who the hell needs an antenna or cable connection for a TV when you have the big I? I've been watching anime and Japanese music videos the whole day, it sorta resparked my passion for Morning Musume!~ Sooooo cuuuute!... Was watching the video for Love Machine and it even had my once favorite musume Ichii Sayaka! Damn haven't heard anything about her for so long I decided to do some research and it totally ruined my morning. She retired?! Shaking my head in disbelief, I actually rubbed my eyes and read the article one more time...*moment of silence*

I just realised that what I just typed might not have made any sense at all to most people but fuck it, it's my blog huh. Well that's all for catching up after 2 days of absence. Will get back to yall' when the Jackass stunt parade gets going tomorrow. Muahahha, it's shush for now, but you'll see, you'll see..

As I type this I'm in Yisheng's room, enjoying his air-con, slacking around. We're like supposed to meet the rest of the party..now? None of them has called yet. Fuckers. Then again, why the hell am I still here too?

Well anyway, I hope he gets lucky in Perth and some pretty hot young thing will hook up with the lil' bastard. Addie, do your job of showing this lil' freshie around!

good luck yisheng!

Rearranged my room, put the PC nicely beside the TV, and used some function of the video card to display full-screen video on the TV. Sweet? Wait till yall' hear what video is on-screen as I'm typing this. Full-Screen Filth is bliss!

For yall' who've watched the French movie Irréversible, I'm sure you'll agree with me that it's disturbing and hard to stomach for perhaps different reasons. The pummeling of the faggot's head with a fire extinguisher, the rape scene, the penises, or more obviously, the camerawork. Fuck, I was like thaaaat close to puking 15 minutes into the show, and all cuz' the first 15 minutes was all shaky and twisting cameras and flashes of penises!

I wouldn't say it's a bad movie because it actually gets subdued towards the middle of the movie, and of course it was not a bad movie at all. That is only if, you're not just out to watch Monica Belluci's titties. Their depiction of rape is graphic and so real, I think even the horniest of normal men can't get a stiffy. Well if anyone reading this did get wood from that scene, you're a sick bastard and you should eat your own shit if it helps. It's sad to see that a good life can be so fragile and bad things can hit you just when you least expect it. I shouldn't put any spoilers here though, so decide if you wanna be a little adventurous and watch this super arty farty, zero-entertainment value, vomit inducing yet *inspiring?* show.

Morale of the story, send your girl home, and girls, force guys to send you home.

David quote of the day (which is so damn outdated cuz' I forgot to add it here) : When I think i'm right, I'm not wrong

3 kopi sessions in a day, a whole load of gaming after that, no sleep for over 20 hours, and I'm still alive and staring at a TV with Final Fantasy X-2 on it. Hardcore? Methinks if I continue to head in this hardcore direction, I'll never get to star in a hardcore video.

Ok let's start from the earliest event. Our Blitz on Tekong was so fun! So much for your respected sergeants and officers cuz' they were putty in the sergeant majors' hands. Getting fucked for some stupid thing like bringing a camera phone is one thing, getting fucked in front of your recruits is another. Also, this made the recruits look at us with such admiration my ego actually received a +5 boost possibly with bless and striking. Nevermind if you don't understand now, cuz' it's just Leo pride.

Also, it's time for a DDD entry! David got a sergeant to pour more syrup into the mix when everyone else seems to be fine with it. 3 conclusions. 1- David just loves to push his luck with authority. 2- David just has to oppose everyone else jst cuz' they think differently from him. 3- he has suffered so much in his life he needs more sweetness than everyone else.

Next, Berd seems to be doing fine with his latest project, so much that we have to suffer the cruel fate of a 1 hour kopi session (which I am complaining about because it's too short) and a postponed movie. That SOB betta make up for things by being hardcore later tonight. Still, goodluck to him and a salute.

*Berd flag flitting in the wind in background*

Cuz' Mr MP here is makin' a trip to Pulau Tekong in like 7 hours. Hope you sergeants will all sign so many extras you can't even serve all of them! Muahahhahaha. DIE!

American Idol. What can I say, reality TV at it's best, entertainment at it's finest, and torture in it's worse form. For proof of what I've just typed here, check this out.

Picture courtesy of http://williamhung.net/
Click the Picture For a Video! Good Deal Huh.

William, you are a Mongoliod. Spare us. But release videos now and then pweeety pweeeety pweeeeze!